


Two Dumbasses and a Spider

by TooAwkwardToFunction



Series: Peter Parker needs a hug but he doesn’t have time for one [1]
Category: MCU, Marvel, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Defenders, daredevil - Fandom
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, He may be blind but he has the hands of a god, He’s also a stubborn Pansexual, M/M, Matt Murdock can fuck whoever he wants, Matt Murdock is also a mess, Peter Parker is a Mess, Peter Parker is a cinnamon roll, Peter Parker is an Avenger, Peter and Wade are one whole idiot, Soft Team Red, Team Red, The Defenders - Freeform, Wade Wilson is a dumbass, ignore me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:27:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22841356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TooAwkwardToFunction/pseuds/TooAwkwardToFunction
Summary: A basic story about the origins of Team Red. Matt Murdock is an unintentional father figure and Peter needs to learn how to handle his shit. Wade is there because he’s bored, and Peter has no sense of self preservation. Together they are Chaotic Evil, in its purest form.(I really just wanted to write a Team Red, Matt and Peter bonding fic because they’re always cute)
Relationships: Luke Cage/Claire Temple, Matt/Foggy, Maybe some Peter/MJ
Series: Peter Parker needs a hug but he doesn’t have time for one [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1642084
Comments: 12
Kudos: 195





	1. Matt Murdock needs a nap but he found a Pupil instead

“I want you to teach me,” 

Matt was tired.  
  


No, Matt was _exhausted_.

Exhausted enough that he didn’t know what to say to the trembling, 5 foot 6 inch cinnamon smelling teen before him, a waver in his voice and sweaty palms. 

Instead, he went for the classic Murdock charm.

“No,” He turned on his heel, walking towards the edge of the roof and leaping off, dropping into a roll once he made it to the building to the right of where the kid still stood. 

Speaking of the unsupervised child, he was still standing on the last rooftop, his entire stance like a lost puppy who just caught sight of his owner.

The image was adorable to Matt, but he didn’t like the fact that _he_ was the owner. 

“Hey, wait!!” A rush of air and then two footsteps were trailing quickly behind Matt, who didn’t dare slow his pace. “I’ll...I promise I learn really quickly! I also have experience...well, not as much as you...Daredevil. Mr. Daredevil sir,” That caught his attention, Matt turned to look at the rambling teen, tilting his head in the direction of his voice.

‘Mr. Daredevil’. Hm, at least he knew some manners.

That didn’t mean Matt was considering actually teaching this child anything.

He definitely wasn’t amused by him. Not even a little bit.

He was still talking, Matt realized, crossing his arms.

The kid, Spider-Man is what he heard from the news. Although, when he was approached by the hero he seemed very insistent that Matt just called him ‘Spidey’.

A nickname he used with civilians?

Matt has no idea. It definitely wasn’t endearing. Not at all.

“I mean, I’ve learned a lot about my spiderish powers, like this thing that I have whenever danger is near. I used it on Mysterio’s illusions in London. Oh, that probably isn’t a good example to bring up. People seem to like me more then when Mr. Jameson started the whole murderer thing, but I have a strict no killing policy. I heard that you don’t kill either so that’s something we have in common!! Oh, when I said I heard stuff about you, it’s all good things, Mr. Daredevil, promise—”

As if this small child could kill anyone.

Well, what he heard from the rumors during his vigilante work...and Foggy, the kid was pretty damn strong.

But killing someone? Matt trusted his ears, and this kids heartbeat was steady throughout his entire ramble session, although admittedly a little fast to be normal. 

“Shush,” Matt was so going to regret this later. Maybe in five seconds. Depends on how he’s feeling. “If I agree to show you some stuff, will you quit doing that...thing you’re doing?” 

“YES!” His heartbeat spiked, Matt noticed briefly. His genuine excitement was already tiring him. “Wait, I mean, which thing are you talking about? Because I shouldn’t agree to any verbal terms of agreement without knowing the agreement itself—”

“That,” Matt gestured vaguely at him, flapping his hand a few times to emphasize his point. “You’re loud. Very talkative. I don’t _do_ talking. Unless it’s interrogating. And I don’t think you want me to interrogate you...Spidey,” 

“No sir!” He squeaked, a little quickly, then muttered a brief apology under his breath.

That didn’t keep the air of excitement around the kid, his entire existence just reeked of happiness. It was throwing off Matt’s whole intimidating ‘Devil of Hell’s Kitchen’ vibes. 

“Good,” He considered his options for a moment, and considered actually training this super powered teen...or taking the stubborn route. “I said I’d show you some stuff,” Spidey nodded enthusiastically, keeping his hands clasped together excitedly behind his back. “Well then, watch,”

And that’s how Matt indirectly mentored Spider-Man.

If only he knew the headache it would bring him.


	2. Peter being the Bicon we all deserve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt was ready for an ass whooping, but he wasn’t ready to seriously consider training his new unofficial sidekick. Maybe his life was more Karate Kid then he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was based purely on a 2 am conversation with my friend. A lot of it could be interpreted as flirting, but it’s just two idiots stepping around each other with word play. I just like well thought out banter, most of it is just flattery. Okay, enjoy!! (Find me on Tumblr @thatonedudeinthecorner).

Matt was beginning to think he didn’t need to teach the kid much, anyways.

On the third night of Spidey following him around the streets of Hell’s Kitchen, observing him beat the shit out of people from rooftops or sticking to the sides of alleys (he still had no idea how he did it), he finally decided to intervene.   
  


Matt got caught up, admittedly, over his head.

He was following the lead of some drug deal taking place within the Russian mob. He did his research, followed some leads, and thought he interrogated enough information out of the unlucky souls who happened to fall in his path. 

Of fucking course it was a trap, why else would something actually go well for him? 

He was surrounded by half of the gang, most of them with weapons (he could smell the rusted pipes and taste the metal bullets), and entirely fucked. 

Like most things Matt does, he immediately accepted that he was going to get his assed whooped, Foggy was going to get mad at him when he turned up probably stabbed, and that he would probably have to push his most recent case back a few hours until his soon to be concussed brain healed at least a little. 

He got into a fighting stance, tilting his head to the side, ready to listen for attacks coming his way. 

What he didn’t expect was the rush of air from behind him, and the faint taste of cinnamon on his tongue.

Oh no.

Oh _no_.

“Kid, I told you to _watch_ ,” He hissed, and they began circling slightly, back to back.

Spidey’s heartbeat spiked again, and he could hear the constriction in his throat, meaning he was about to say something. 

“Who’s says I ain’t looking?”

And, well, whatever Matt was expecting him to say it wasn’t _that_.

Who knew he had it in him? 

“If you die, that’s on you,” He warned, hearing the faint snort from under his breath. 

“Bring it on,” 

The rest of the fight was a blur.

He punched one guy in the face, turning to kick another, clawing a new one across the face, nearly biting someone, and jumping over a pipe. He flipped with help from the nearby brick wall, dodging a bullet with relative ease.

From what he could hear, the kid wasn’t half bad either. 

He hopped over one guy’s punch, kicking him in the face with his momentum.

The three behind him, preparing to corner him when he landed, weren't expecting him to gain his footing on the wall, sliding to a crouch maybe ten feet in the air, catching his breath.

Matt had to hold in a laugh, the image of an actual spider on a wall coming into his head, or what he remembered of a spider.

He briefly wondered if he gave himself the name “Spider-Man” or if it was a split second decision of the press, putting the two images the kid displayed into one. It was the name with him being the supposed “Devil of Hell’s Kitchen” (which first of all, ouch, his Catholic heart).

Matt turned, kneeing a guy in the gut before he gripped his shoulders, flinging him back into oncoming assaulters. 

Spidey, after surveying the playing field for a moment, flipped back into the fray, shooting one of his...webs (Matt wasn’t sure but it reeked of chemicals and, for some reason, soap) to one of the nearest guys to Matt, yanking him back as he flew forward.

When he reached the end of the sticky line, Spidey pulled him back, wrapping the man in the fluid before kicking him into the wall, taking two more men with him.

They stuck, with an odd sound Matt decided to file in his ‘ask what this looks like’ list for later.

“What,” Matt rasped, his fist dripping with blood, the metallic taste filling his mouth. “The fuck,”

“Are you mad?” He tilted his head, making sure all of the mob members were unconscious, before listening closer to the kid’s heart. It had stayed a steady speed, probably still brimming with adrenaline. “Earlier I was joking because it looked like you needed help, and it was like an impulse thing? Being sassy, I mean. I didn’t mean to disrespect, Mr. Daredevil, but it seemed appropriate and I mean, I thought it was kind of cool, like mid-fight banter, like from that really old movie I watched once with M...with my friend—”

Matt silenced him with a hand, then stood up straighter, making an attempt to appear as if he was staring directly at Spidey.

“No, no not that,” He made as if to grab his shoulder, then thought better of it, turning the motion into a swift stride past the kid. “Where in the world did you learn...whatever that was. You were flipping around like crazy, and that _web_ thing you did? Are you from a circus or a rodeo or something?” 

“Like Robin?” 

“Doesn’t matter. Your punching was awful, don’t get me wrong, but everything else?” 

The kid seemed nervous, he could smell the sweat gathering in his palms. “I, uh,” He waited patiently, letting the kid think it over. “I watched Karate kid once?” 

_He_ _watched_...Matt couldn’t help himself, he barked out a laugh, scaling a fire escape easily. “Why is that always what comes back to find me?” He muttered under his breath.

Spidey appeared next to him a moment later, staying a few steps behind him, fiddling with some type of device on his wrists. “I’ve heard about you too, Spidey,”

“Pardon?” His fidgeting slowed for a second, then started slightly faster almost immediately. 

“You’re an avenger, if I’m right,” He hoped he was right, he spent at least three hours searching this asshole on the internet. “You could be training with, what did they call themselves, Shield? Why are you hunting down the Devil?” 

“Well, I don’t think you can be that bad after everything you’ve done,” He muttered, and Matt had to restrain himself from softening his features. “SHIELD and I aren’t exactly...well let’s say they had a bad security breach a while back and I kinda...gave them shit for it,”

His voice grew quieter at the end, throwing in the swear carefully.

“I want to learn from you. You fight really well and, I don’t know, you aren’t all high and mighty like everything I would’ve gotten if I went to the avengers. I’m not like them. I...look out for the little guy. And if you do, too, then the Devil can’t be all bad, can he?” 

_Smooth tongue_ , he noted, considering his words for a moment. 

“I didn’t choose the name,” He said after a moment, turning to face Spidey, giving his least lawyer-ish smile. It felt more like a grimace to him, but he felt Spidey grin back. “You have a phone, sweet talker?” 

“Let’s just say I save the flattery to impress the good guys,” 

He could work with this. 


	3. Spideypool but it’s Bromantic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter is a meme, but Wade is more of a meme so he has to rethink his life choices and stop meme-ing for like five seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m procrastinating literally everything else that probably needs to be done but I’m depressed and this makes me happy. I love Peter and Wade, put them together and what could go wrong? (Literally everything but go off I guess). I don’t think it’s Wade actually flirting but it’s just him being weird and appreciating an ass when he sees one. I’m dying, so like.  
> Tumblr? Hit me up @thatonedudeinthecorner, I make memes.

It had been three months since Peter convinced Daredevil to teach him how to fight.

Three months of making excuses to May so he could head down to an old abandoned gym in Hell’s Kitchen.

Three months of awkwardly explaining to Ned that not much was happening with his Spider-Man patrols, and that he was only tired because everything ran _so_ smoothly he kept losing track of time.

Three months of dealing with MJ’s glare from a distance, who somehow _knew_ what he was up to but refused to explain why it bothered her so much.

Three months of getting his ass handed to him by a snarky man in a red leather suit. 

So everything was going _great_. 

Peter had recently been allowed by Sensei Double D to patrol by himself.

He didn’t end up doing much on most nights, stopping any crime he saw or heard, but usually he ended up sitting on the edge of a rooftop while he waited for the hour or two lull in criminal activity to pass by. 

For a city that never slept it sure was lazy.

It just so happened that on one of these hours, Peter happened to be disturbed by something far worse than a potential threat. He was disturbed by a potential _friend_.

Friend being an iffy term, at least to Peter, when he first met the guy. 

It was a Friday, one of the nights Peter allowed himself to stay out particularly late, when his Spidey sense started buzzing at the base of his neck.

At first he didn’t think anything was wrong. He had settled himself down near the ledge of an apartment complex, listening as a guitarist strummed away on their fire escape, trying to make his ADHD tendencies disappear.

Daredevil was particularly fond of meditation, so Peter assumed there was no better time to calm your mind than when someone was humming Bohemian Rhapsody.

The hairs on the back of his neck stood up and Peter knew he was fucked. 

He heard the sound of someone dropping onto the rooftop a moment later, resisting the urge to whip around, instead keeping his cool as he assessed the situation.

He was alone, so that’s a start. Daredevil taught him a lot about opening his senses, using his enhanced abilities to see what he couldn't exactly _see_.

Yeah, it was weird to Peter as well. He had enhanced sight, too, so whatever Daredevil was teaching him, it decided to ignore all of that and focus on _listening_.

The other vigilante had a huge thing about listening, Peter suspected it had something to do with his millennial attitude when he was probably a boomer. (Not that he would voice any of this, that dude was freaking _scary_ ). 

The person approaching was male, from what he could tell. The guy smelled of gunpowder and leather, big footsteps meant that he was either carrying something with him, or he had a strong build.

Peter assumed it was both, based on the soft clank that came with every step (guns?).

Despite the whole menacing aura the dude gave off, Peter had decided to ignore his Spidey sense and let the guy approach.

A horrible decision, really. 

“Shut up, yellow, I’m getting to it,” His voice was low, but had a sort of edge to it, meaning he was purposefully whispering in that deep baritone, but it wasn’t his actual range.

Peter almost shivered when he could practically _feel_ the tense in the guys throat when he spoke (what the hell had Double D _done_ to him?!?!).

The man cleared his throat, and Peter wrung his hands tighter in his lap. “Okay, I know this isn’t the best thing to start off with, but,” Peter was right about his voice, but his silent pride was overwhelmed by the impending sense that he was about to say something _very_ dumb. “ _Daaamn_ , boy, you be lookin fine in that suit. I am the nice ass police and you’re about to get a ticket!” 

What.

The.

_Fuck_.

Peter was about to get offended, but his Spidey-sense kicked in, alerting him that the guy was still approaching.

Out of sheer panic, he turned in one swift motion, seeing the red suit, white lenses, and the close proximity of the guy before _reacting_. Without a second thought, Peter ignores whatever intent the masked man had in getting next to him (most likely to sit down besides him, but Peters’s brain decided to go full battle mode), sliding his foot slightly behind him and swinging his fist forward.

Only afterwards, when the man was mid-fall off of the ledge, did Peter realize that _ohhh the was the wrong thing to do_. 

He stood at the ledge for a moment, just panicking by himself. What was he thinking? Did he just kill someone? Oh, what if the cops came after him? What if—

A millisecond later, after flapping his hands a few times as his anxiety took over, he slapped the side of his head.

“Oh, der,” He jumped after the guy, shooting a web towards his back, then another in the opposite direction, catching the corner of a building. He maneuvered so that most of his momentum was in the swing, carrying the leather-clad man upwards as he swung down, pulling him under his arm in a quick motion before letting go of both webs.

He continued in the direction of the brick building, landing on the side of the wall, sticking easily with his feet. “Are you okay, dude? You surprised me, I’m so sorry!” 

He let out a breath of relief through his nose, using his free hand to steady both of them against the wall from his crazy super powered stunt. 

“OMG OMG OMG!!” The guy ignored Peter’s precarious hold around his middle, wiggling around so he was facing him, his hands to his mask.

Peter tilted his head, trying to figure out how the eyes of his mask could perfectly display the movement of his eyebrows.

“You’re _Spider-Man_ ! And you _saved_ me!!” 

“Uh,” Peter was beginning to regret his decision, wincing at the sheer volume of the man’s voice. “Both of those things are true,” 

  
“I’m such a new fan of yours and I’m deciding right now to dub myself your biggest fan. Screw Captain America, he’s never held me in his arms!!” The guy proceeded to reach up, once again ignoring Peter’s very _delicate_ balance, clinging to his neck as he pressed his chin to the top of Peter’s mask. “This is now the best day of my life, new idol of mine,” 

“Uhhhh,” Where in Daredevil’s lessons did he prepare Peter for _this_? “I feel really bad asking, but, um, who are you?” 

“Oh, no trouble at all, Spidey,” He continued to squeeze Peter tightly in a hug, which made climbing up the side of the building more difficult than it usually was.

“You’re fairly new to the heroey spectrum, AND you didn’t let me fall to my death. I assumed you might have an idea of who I am but you’re just too _pure_ for that,” 

“Pure?” He muttered to himself, his left hand reaching the railing of the building’s ledge, gripping it tightly.

He hauled himself up, which was right around the time that this mystery man untangled himself from around Peter, sitting on the ledge. 

“Mhm, I can tell, you’re actually being nice to me. It’s kinda weird but I like it,” 

“Why...wouldn’t I?” Peter tapped his chin from outside the mask, trying to run through the list of names he’d been told previously to avoid.

His brain was blanking on anything that had to do with possibly dangerous men wearing a red leather suit, swinging his feet over the ledge of a building like a little kid.

  
(Peter couldn’t judge, though, having been swinging his own legs over the side of the apartment complex only a few minutes prior).  
  


“Pure,” The guy squealed, turning his head to look at Peter quickly. “Get ready for a badass delivery, white,” He said, then shot a finger gun at Peter. “The names Pool. Deadpool,” 

First, Peter giggled a little at the James Bond reference.

Second, that momentary joy was cut short, a small barrier in his mind breaking, a flood of information about an extremely dangerous mercenary clad in red with katanas filling his thoughts.

Well, _shit_. 

“Hi Deadpool, I’m Spidey,”

Whatever Peter was hoping you accomplish by continuing the conversation, he doesn’t know.

But he did gain a companion on his next patrol.

And the one after that.

And the one after that.

This was going to be a _long_ month. 


	4. A Spider follows Matt to work and he’s mildly impressed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt’s in civilian clothing when he meets Spidey this time, and it’s just his luck that the kid somehow found a way into his work life, as an intern??? He’s going to be the death of Matt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry but I just love the Matt meets Peter at his law office and he’s the new intern plot line. It’s just really funny to me, and I feel like both of them know who the other is, but refuse to say it as like bro-code. Plus I was in the mood for sassy Matt content. I’ve been trying to update more stuff because corona (fun fun fun) but this is always my feel good story and I was super bored. (Tumblr? @thatonedudeinthecorner). Okay, adios!!

Matt was having a pretty good day.

He’d woken up on time, found his favorite textured suit to wear (recently cleaned which made it smell even nicer), made himself coffee because he had _just_ enough for another pot, and nobody had commented or tried to help him on his walk to work. 

Of course something had to ruin that.

Five seconds into him entering the office, he was bombarded with the smell of Karen burning toast. He leaned his cane against the wall, shutting the door softly behind him. 

“Karen?” He called, moving into his office to set his bag down. “I don’t think smearing butter on it is going to change the flavor,” He added, then heard the clank of a knife against the table, obviously startling the woman. 

“Jesus,” She murmured, placing a hand over her heart. Matt could tell it was beating a little too fast than normal, and decided to bask in the joy of scaring her for a few more moments. 

“No, it’s just Matt,” 

“You,” Her voice shook for a moment as she held in a laugh, turning back to the toast which was lying a few inches away from the toaster on a napkin. “It’s unsalvageable, huh?” 

“Trust the nose, not the eyes,” She snorted at that, and Matt heard Foggy exit his office, mug in hand based on the vibrations bouncing around it as he spoke around his sip.

“You’re on time for once,” His best friend for however many years now spoke around a smile, and a cup of coffee apparently. 

“I feel as if you’re trying to insult me,” 

“Hardy har,” Karen genuinely chuckled, despite Foggy’s cheerful mock laughter. “Lower your sass levels, Mister, we’re expecting a guest,”

Matt sniffed for a moment, trying to ignore the scent of burnt toast that ruined his focus. “That does make sense. This is a law office. Where we make money off of people coming here for help?” 

“Watch it,” Matt felt the air shift, smiling as Foggy poked a finger at him. “The one morning we need optimistic Matt, we get his sassy twin,” He continued to mumble to himself as he walked over to refill his coffee, leaving a bemused Matt and Karen in his wake. 

“I guess you have a twin now,” Karen chuckled, brushing past Matt to get to her desk, opening a drawer to get a granola bar after her failed attempt at breakfast. 

“I suppose I do,” He tilted his head at the crinkle of a wrapper, trying to expand his senses to see if anyone was entering the building. “Who are we expecting?” 

He could practically feel Karen’s smile as she rolled her eyes. “Our new intern. Remember? This is Nelson, Murdock, and Paige. We need someone to help around the office,” 

“Ah yes, an intern,” He heard the door open a few floors below, welcoming the smell of a freshly washed dress shirt, along with the familiar taste of cinnamon on his tongue.

_Why was that so familiar?_

“Since when were we hiring interns?” 

Foggy snorted from where he stirred milk into his coffee, the spoon making a clanking noise as he moved it around the mug.

“Since we started getting more customers. Somebody has to keep us organized, and Karen claims she found the perfect match!!” 

“I wouldn’t say perfect, but I think people will definitely warm up to him. He gives off just such a puppy vibe, I don’t know what it is,” 

“Living puppy, I’m creating the mental picture,” Matt smiled, turning his head all the way so Karen could see it. 

“He should be here any second,” She sat down at her desk, glancing at her phone for a minute to presumably check the time. 

“He’s here, or at least I’m guessing that’s him,” Matt, held up a hand, spreading his fingers.

“He’s walking up the stairs. I’d say he’d be here in five,” He lowered one finger. “Four, three, two…”

He placed his hand down entirely when the door opened slowly. From what he could tell, a teenager stood before them, eyes wide and hands slightly sweaty. 

“O-oh, I’m sorry I probably should’ve knocked,” He bounced on the balls of his feet for a moment, using his entire head as he looked around the office from his spot in the doorway. 

“We don’t rely too heavily on manners,” Foggy assured him, stepping back into the main office space and approaching the boy. “Don’t worry about it, welcome to our office!!” 

“I feel as if that was directed at me,” Matt snarked, and he felt Foggy stick his tongue out. 

  
The kid seemed to slowly ease into the situation, allowing Foggy to lead him into the room gently.

Matt furrowed his brows slightly. That scent, the cinnamon was triggering something in his brain, and Matt’s curiosity was piqued.

Listening just a little closer, Matt focused in on his heartbeat. 

No _fucking_ way. 

His voice was a little less confident, but Matt would recognize it anywhere.

Heartbeat fast, a little too fast for any normal human, and that damn cinnamon scent that always followed him.

This was no ordinary teen. This was a super powered teen.

One Matt was familiar with.

He mentally scolded himself for not recognizing him sooner. 

But that posed another question: what was Spider-Man doing in his office?

Why did it have to be Spidey of all people who was chosen to be an intern. He supposed Karen probably fell victim to the kids persistent charm, one that anyone seemed to be susceptible to.  
  


But really? Hell's Kitchen? Why did this kid keep finding his way back on Matt’s turf? Why did he always seem to find _him_? 

He felt the kid tense as he looked at Matt, and Matt immediately cleared his expression, putting on a half smile. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” He held a hand out to the kid, to which he took with minimal hesitation. “I wish I’d known that we had hired an intern, but it’s always nice to be surprised,” 

The kid laughed lightly, and he could practically feel everyone’s gaze soften. “Sorry, Mr. Murdock, I had no idea you didn’t know” 

“Nonsense, feel free to call me Matt,” He was wearing a more natural smile, hoping it masked his previous analysis. 

“Well, I’m Peter. Parker. Peter Parker,” He stumbled with his words, laughing a little at himself. “I’ve only really spoken with Ms. Paige,” 

“I told you to call me Karen,” She chided, but Peter seemed to wave her off with a look. 

“But Ms. Paige,” She snorted, and Matt could feel the blood rush to Peter’s face. “Anyways, it’s really nice to meet you all in person, I hope I’ll be able to help around here, I’ve also had experience in interning. I have some of my resume on me,”

“That’s okay, Peter, we’ve already sorted this out over the phone. My partners trust my judgement,” 

“If we didn’t we’d probably be dead,” Foggy teased as he leaned forward, and Karen batted him away with her hand. 

“Where did you work before?” Matt decided to ignore the two of them, listening as Peter zipped up his bag again. 

“Oh, I uh, I recently stopped interning at Stark Industries. I mean, I’m still involved and everything, but I think I need a break from all of that. After...well, after everything that’s happened,”

The room was filled with a heavy silence.

They’d all been involved in the recent superhero drama, being snapped away from existence and all. They’d all heard of Tony Stark’s death and experienced the toll the ‘Blip’ had taken on society. Being gone for five years was hard to adjust to, but there wasn’t really anything they could do except try to move on, try to adjust to a world where half of the population had five years to make up for.

Matt could feel the pity rising in his throat, to which he quickly stamped down. He hated being pitied, and he tried to keep from doing the same to others.

But it was hard to ignore the sympathy he had for the kid, especially when it sounded like he’d been close to Stark himself.

He could only imagine how badly that would fuck someone up. He didn’t blame him for wanting to take a break from all of the trauma.

Karen cleared her throat, trying to break the awkward silence they’d created.

“Well, I’m sure they’ll miss you, especially after all the things I’ve heard. You’re a bright kid, Peter, I’m sure there’s a lot you’ll be able to help us with around here,”

Peter swallowed dryly, and Matt could feel that he wanted to say something before he decided against it. “I’ll do my best!” 

He knew what a hard worker Spidey was, now it was time for him to see just how similar the hero was to Peter Parker. 


	5. The Intern (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter contemplates how to not fuck up his brand new job while also not spilling the beans on knowing who Daredevil is. In the midst of his internal struggle, Matt goes missing. Peter flips the fuck out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the only thing I’ve been thinking about for the past two days: Peter having to either reveal his secret identity or getting caught in the middle of Spiderish behavior in front of Foggy and Karen. This is what I ended up writing so there!! Comment if you wanna, I enjoy reading them :) (Tumblr? @thatonedudeinthecorner) I’m working on Part 2 right now, so just...I’ll be back soon!!

Peter wasn’t sure how he’d ended up with an internship at Nelson, Murdock, & Paige.

He wanted to get out of the Avenger setting for a while, but maybe he was relying on Hell’s Kitchen too much.   
  


Which brought another issue. 

How did Peter end up working with Daredevil _again_? 

He’d been under the man’s guidance for some time now, so walking into the law office and immediately recognizing him left Peter with emotional whiplash. 

Was he just not supposed to say anything? Was there some sort of secret bro code that all vigilantes followed that laid out instructions on the perfect setting in which to reveal secret identities? Did he know it was Peter as soon as he applied for the job? 

Five minutes into his first meeting with the man and Peter’s questions were answered.

One: Matt _definitely_ knew it was Peter. Maybe it was his intuition talking, but Daredevil always got this little smirk on his face when he knew something Peter didn’t, and now staring into his unmasked face, Peter _knew_ that he knew...if it made any sense. 

Two: Peter wasn’t going to be the one to approach the issue. He was perfectly content with dancing around the problem until someone else decided to solve it. He was awkward, okay? Marching up to someone and accusing them of being one of the most widely known vigilantes in New York did not bode well with Peter’s skill set.

What if he was jumping to conclusions? What if Matt just _really_ looked like Double D? He could not deal with the embarrassment if he was somehow wrong.

Plus that would raise a whole new set of questions of how _Peter_ knew Daredevil. And Matt was a very smart guy, if Peter knew anything. The dude did make a living in practically analyzing people’s lives and the law. 

Which brought Peter to three: how the _fuck_ was he going to look at this guy every tuesday, wednesday, and thursday (with the occasional addition of saturdays due to Peter’s hesitance to remain at Stark Industries) without physically combusting? 

He’d been told his job was to do the simple task around the office, like sorting files, going on coffee runs, greeting clients.

So far, Peter could confidently say he avoided most interaction with Mr. Murdock, only really talking to Karen for the hour or two he’d been there. (He refused to call her Karen to her face, it left a sort of sour taste in his mouth when Peter thought of the Karen in the suit Mr. Stark made him, one he hadn’t used in months).

Peter was happily filing a case into one of the cabinets behind Ms. Paige’s desk when his Spidey sense went off. Was she going to stand up? Was there someone about to walk into the office? Was there a sniper outside? 

Peter quickly turned his head when he heard a sound, not moving from his crouch in front of the drawer. Foggy, or Mr. Nelson, as Peter had immediately labeled him, came strolling out of his office, a stack of papers in his hands that he proudly dumped on Karen’s desk. 

“I’m not doing anything else for the next five years,” He announced, stretching his arms above his head with a soft pop in his joints. 

“That’ll be pretty bad for business,” Karen teased, glancing up from her computer briefly. “You hear that, Peter? I think you’re going to be replacing the Nelson on the sign. Parker, Murdock, & Paige,” Peter giggled a little, closing the cabinet as he sat down completely on his butt, giving Foggy an innocent look over his shoulder. 

“Look out, Mr. Nelson, I’ve got absolutely no experience in the practice of law, but I’m coming after your job. And I’m already turning your partner against you,”

Foggy grinned at him, sticking a thumb in his direction as he turned to Karen. “Did you do this? I leave him alone for thirty minutes and you’ve already corrupted his politeness,” 

“You have no proof,” She shot back, and they bickered lightheartedly for a few more seconds.

Peter let their voices drown into the background, more focused on his very insistent Spidey sense. He thought Foggy appearing unexpectedly was what triggered it, but something else was continuing to prick at the back of his neck. 

“Hey, kid, you think you can hand these to Matty?” Foggy shook Peter out of his thinking, and Peter turned to look at him. He had a few papers in his hand, outstretched in Peter’s direction. 

“Hm?” He stood, carefully taking the papers from his grasp, ignoring the anxiety pooling in his stomach. “Yeah, no prob,”   
  


“Thanks,” Foggy gave him a sideways glance as he quickly hurried to Matt’s office, opening the door with his freehand. 

“Uh, Mr. Murdock,” The door swung closed behind him ominously, which didn’t help the already dark room. Since he was blind Peter understood that he probably wouldn’t _need_ any light, but really? Was this some sort of cosmic set up that really wanted Peter to be afraid? Fuck that. “Mr. Nelson wanted me to give you these...um…” He trailed off, squinting his eyes as if it would help them adjust to the dark quicker.

Maybe it was his senses acting up, but Peter didn’t see Matt anywhere, which was unusual, especially for Peter.

Ever since he was bitten by the spider, he’d had enhanced sight, improving his pretty crappy vision by allowing him to see miles away (if he focused _really_ hard) and in the dark. He came up with nothing. 

The window was open but that was because it was summer. Peter quickly rushed over to said window, pulling the blinds all the way up and leaning out.

He closed his eyes and listened. 

A man was walking his dog two blocks over. Some police officer was finishing an arrest just as a teen nearby opened a pack of gum.

_Focus Peter_ , he scolded himself, inhaling deeply and ignoring the classic city stench, searching desperately for the fabric softener he smelled earlier when he’d first met Matt.

He was drugged from behind. A dart? Peter sniffed again to try and catch the direction in which the scent was coming from. Definitely a dart.

Sweat, there was pen ink that got on one of their hands, smudging from a document on his desk. Two men had snuck in after Matt passed out, if he could just... _there_.

His ears picked up on the sound of two pairs of heavy boots, hauling a heavy load (Mr. Murdock) between the two of them five blocks to the south. Peter could catch up to them, they had to travel through alleys and over buildings. 

Quickly ducking back inside, Peter shoved the papers onto Matt’s desk, praying that they wouldn’t blow away with a sudden gust of wind. He had his webshooters on him, but his suit was in his bag, which was in the other room.

He could grab it and just make a run for it, try and wait Karen and Foggy out, try to sneak past them and into the suit, or he could just go plain suit-less. 

The last option sounded like the best, although the most dangerous in the long run. Peter tapped his wrists together, the familiar band of his web shooters appearing.

He inhaled deeply through his nose, squaring his shoulder. He was in the middle of getting into the right stance to leap out the window when someone cleared their throat behind him. 

“I would ask if you pushed Matt out the window but I don’t think that’s the case,” Peter stumbled forward, catching himself on the corner of the desk.

Foggy was leaning on the frame of the door, his arms crossed, giving Peter an unimpressed look. “Explain, _now_ ,” 


	6. The Intern (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter gets cornered in an office he can easily escape and has to explain to two frantic lawyers that he knows about Matt’s extracurricular activities. He was definitely going to lose his lunch break over this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! Pretty quickly! I suddenly got inspired to ignore all my work and write this instead. Maybe there’ll be a part 3, or maybe this is just one of those occurrences that is just glossed over. I haven’t decided. Anyways, comment if y’all want, I love reading them!! (Tumblr? @thatonedudeinthecorner). Until next time!!

Peter was screwed.

In the back of his head his spidey sense was still buzzing, keeping a constant reminder that Matt was being hauled away this very second.

Peter would love to go after said kidnappers, but Foggy and Karen were currently keeping him held hostage. 

“So you have no idea where Matt is, and you were about to jump out the window to look for him?” Karen pinched the bridge of her nose at Foggy’s words, expressing her exasperation. 

“Well...I was going to _look_ out the window, not jump,” Peter managed, his leg bouncing up and down with newfound adrenaline in his system.

He could easily outrun them, but that would probably be a bad thing to do, if he wanted to keep his job. 

“Right. And you needed a running start for _looking_ out the window,” Foggy modded sarcastically, and Peter shut his eyes as he cringed in embarrassment. 

Karen sighed, slamming her hand on the table a moment later. “This obviously isn’t going anywhere. Peter, you know Matt’s extracurricular activities, don’t you?” 

_Extracurricular_ , he mouthed to himself, then realization dawned. He nodded mutely. “And you’re somehow involved with...all of that, right? That’s why you’ve been acting super nervous around him?” Again, Peter agreed silently. “Okay, so that means…”

“I know where he is,” Peter blurted out, puffing up his cheeks after he did so. 

“How?” Foggy raised an eyebrow, and Peter slowly lifted up his hands, which he’d previously been sitting on. 

“I’m uh...I’m sorta a big part of those extracurriculars,” He stared at his shoes as Karen inspected his web shooters, her eyes going wide. 

“Are these...are you…?” 

“BUT YOU’RE LIKE TWELVE!!” Foggy suddenly exclaimed, pointing a finger in Peter’s face before remembering personal boundaries. 

“Uh, I’m _like_ sixteen, thank you very much,” He grumbled, shifting in the chair they’d pushed him into. He sighed, feeling the waves of irritation and surprise rolling off of the two. “Look, whatever you think is going on, you’re probably blowing it out of proportion. _I_ decided to do this. _I_ decided. Don’t blame Mr. Murdock…” He began to stand, but Karen pushed him back down gently. 

“Not so fast Peter, we need to know what’s going on,” Peter stared at her for a moment, then sighed heavily. 

“You do know I could just flip over the desk and out the window?” They exchanged a glance and he stood again, this time they let him go to his bag. “Someone has Daredevil and they’re currently kidnapping him. I think it might be the Russian mob, we took them out a few weeks ago,” Foggy caught his breath at the way Peter casually mentioned all of this, pulling out a small red and blue box. “I’m going to go after him and you two are going to stay here,” 

He stood back up, turning to face the two adults in front of him, his jaw set. Karen crossed her arms. “Yeah, I’m not comfortable with that, you’re taking us with you,”

“No, you’ll slow me down,” He paused for a moment, then sheepishly smiled at them. “No offense,” 

“I’m going to be offended anyway,” Foggy muttered, then pointed at the box. “So...what’s in the box,” 

Peter laughed, unzipping his hoodie quickly, placing it on top of his bag. “The real question is: what _is_ the box,”

He clicked a button on the top which activated the nanotechnology, his suit slowly forming over his skin. He watched as Foggy’s jaw dropped open, and he stretched his arms quickly, getting comfortable in the suit. 

“Holy shit, Karen you hired Spider-Man,” He pointed at Peter, looking between him and Karen. “Holy shit, Spider-Man is a teenager,”

“I’ll get him back,” He bent down to dig in his bag, pulling out his mask. He walked over to the window, the two adults moving silently as he passed them. “I’m _kinda_ good at my job,” He grinned at them, pulling his mask over his head quickly and sliding the window open. 

“Good luck,” Karen called, at last. Peter turned, the lenses of his mask adjusting to suit his smile under it. 

“I’ll be back, ten minutes tops,”

  
He jumped out, hanging on to the window sill by his fingertips. He peeked his head over quickly, laughing a little. “Does this count as my lunch break?”

Foggy snorted, waving him away, and Peter grinned again, leaping off of the wall and shooting a web to the building over.

_Hold on Matt_ , he thought to himself, flipping over rooftops and landing on the side of a building, running across the window, _I’m coming_. 


	7. No Cops at Pride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Only Spider-Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! For Pride Month! My gay ass couldn't resist. I know this is an overused prompt but it's so fucking fun to write Spidey at Pride! With the whole corona thing, and physical pride being canceled, the least I can do is write about it. ACAB!!! BLACK LIVES MATTER!! For the end of the world in 2020, the least we can do is get some fucking equality! Anyways, comment if you want to, I love reading comments! Also, go bother me on Tumblr (@thatonedudeinthecorner). Happy Pride Month everyone! You're all valid and I love you! Okay, that's all for this week folks, until next chapter!!

“What am I looking at?” Peter asked Ned, who had shoved his phone in his face mere seconds beforehand.

They were planning what they were going to do that weekend, attending the Pride parade at the top of the list. Peter was just about to ask if they should invite MJ over when he heard his friend gasp. Thus why the phone was in his face. 

“Just...just look at what it says,” He dropped the phone into Peter’s lap, and he hesitated before picking it up, tilting his head as he read. 

“‘No cops at Pride, only Spider-Man’?” He read aloud, feeling himself smile as he scrolled through the comments, one of the most recent being posted by Ned himself. “What is this?” 

“The community,” Ned said simply, grinning. “It’s got like...a billion views,”

“No…”

“Yes!” His friend insisted, scooting closer to him on the couch, taking his phone back. “ACAB, Peter, they want you instead!” 

“I…” He didn’t know what to say. He felt extremely flattered, but this was...a lot. It was also a meme of some sort, but by the few comments he had read, people were quite serious about the prospect. He looked at the post, then to Ned’s beaming. “I...think I might need a new suit,” Ned cheered. 

...

By that Saturday, Peter was practically vibrating with excitement.

He’d spoken with Pepper when she’d walked in on him in the lab, shouting “RAINBOW!” at the keyboard as he designed a suit. She set up more practical security, gladly sending invitations to the rest of the Avengers (most of which who were joining Peter on his journey to replace the cops at Pride).

Spider-Man had used his ‘official’ Instagram to announce his compliancy with the idea--receiving extreme response from what seemed to be the entire state of New York. He’d asked Daredevil to join him as well, asking Foggy and Karen if they were attending in an offhanded manner, knowing they’d already seen the ‘Only Spider-Man’ posts. 

“You look suited for the occasion,” MJ said from behind him, and he whirled around, mask in hand. She wasted no time in entering his room, her hands sneaking around his middle as she pressed her chin on his shoulder.

They stayed like that for a while, grinning at each other in the mirror. He’d replaced all of the black webbing-stitch on his suit with multi-colored fabric, the spider emblem in the middle replicating the gay pride flag. Additionally, he was wearing a jean jacket over it, the bisexual flag painted on the back, LGBTQIA+ pins decorating the sleeves. He wished he could go out without his mask on, skipping his plan of glittery make-up because of it. 

“You look amazing, too,” He added softly, turning his head slightly to peck her cheek, wrinkling his nose when he noticed some of her face paint on his lips. 

“I always look amazing,” She shot back, letting go of him to twirl around in her rainbow skirt, expertly maneuvering in her platform shoes. She’d always been taller than Peter, but now she was practically towering over him.

( ~~And Peter couldn’t bring himself to mind~~ )

“Hey,” Ned poked his head into the room, his rainbow fedora nearly toppling off of his head. “We have to get going, you promised to meet up with the organizers an hour early,”

Peter rolled his eyes, looking over his work one more time before meeting Ned in the doorway, MJ not far behind him. “You look fabulous,” He said, watching as Ned inspected his suit, looking up at the compliment. 

“Flattery will get you nowhere, you gotta go!” Peter leaned forward to kiss his cheek anyway, giggling as Ned yelled after him, pulling his mask over his head as he reached the door. 

“May!” He called, hearing her hum from the kitchen. “I’ll be back later, I love you!” 

“I love you too, sweetheart! Have fun!” She responded from the kitchen, and he smiled to himself, rushing to the stairwell. Taking the steps two at a time, he reached the roof door, getting to the ledge a few moments later. 

“Karen,” He whispered, his hands shaking with excess energy. “Are you ready to be gay and _stop_ crime?”

“Always, Peter,” the AI responded, sounding amused. “You have an incoming call from a Harley Keener, inside Iron Lad suit #0536, would you like me to answer?” 

Peter rolled his shoulder a few times, checking his webshooters one last time before closing his eyes. “Yes, please,” He flipped off of the roof just as the call connected, whooping once as he fell.

Today was going to be great.

...

Peter was sticking to the side of a building, watching the floats getting ready, a bouquet of multi-colored flowers tucked under an arm. He’d just finished speaking with the coordinators, the parade route and information on the groups participating in the march swimming in his head. A voice broke him out of his musings, coming from the crowd of people below him. 

“Yo Spidey!” They called, jumping up and down as they waved. He raised a hand in greeting, giving them a ‘one-second’ gesture as he secured the flowers, running across the glass windows, leaping to the building on the other side of the street, flipping to the sidewalk smoothly. 

“Hey!” He greeted, mock saluting them. “You summoned me?”

They grinned at their friends, adjusting the non-binary flag over their shoulders like a cape. “You actually came!” He nodded, and they laughed. “I was just going to compliment your suit, you didn’t need to come all the way down here,” 

He waved them off, plucking an orange flower from the bundle he carried under his arm. “Thank you! I love your hair, by the way,” He extending the flower towards them as they brought a hand to their shaved head, the fuzz died a bright blue color that complimented their dark eyes. “It was nice meeting you!” They took the flower and he used his free hand to fist bump one of their friends who was standing a few feet behind them. 

“I should be saying that to you!” They managed, but he just winked, flipping back into the air and shooting ut a web. 

“Happy Pride!” He shouted before he swung away, getting a round of applause at his words. 

Soon after, he was stopped by a group of girls, one of which was shouting at him because of his jacket. 

“Hey!” She yelled, cupping her hands around her mouth. “Hey! Is that a Bi flag?” He slid to a stop on a nearby car, pointing at himself. She rolled her eyes good-naturedly, getting a few whispers out of her friends. “Is that a bi flag, Spidey?” 

He noted her own shirt, ‘I put the bi in bitch’, standing up straight and turning around, giving her full view of his jacket. “Yup!” He popped the ‘p’, turning to face her again. He had attracted the attention of the people around him, some moving closer as he spoke. “Bisexual and proud! You too?” He pointed to her shirt, and she looked down at it as if just noticing. 

“Hell yeah!” She said and he cheered, kneeling down near the edge of the car, waving her closer. She complied, quirking a brow at him as he plucked a flower out for her, holding it towards her as she closed the distance. 

“Here, it matches your shirt,” He shot her finger guns after she’d accepted his gift, taking out a few other flowers for people standing by. He gave her one last wave, then shot off again, just as another group of marchers rounded on the street.

He’d made his rounds, meeting up with Sam Wilson for a few minutes around noon, but he was off again, enjoying the parade, interacting with the people, and stopping any unwanted homophobes from bothering the crowd. 

He was down to his last flower, twirling it between his thumb and index finger as he swung near central park. 

“Spidey!” Someone called to him, and he almost fell mid-swing. Re-composing himself, he redirected his next web, landing in a roll in front of a young boy. He was wearing a trans pin on his hoodie, fiddling with the string as Peter approached him, bending on a knee to be eye level. 

“You called?” He asked softly, taking in mind the nervous air the kid had around him. 

“I heard you were here,” He started quietly, and Peter noticed a woman standing not too far behind him, watching the exchange with a small smile. “I...you’re my favorite superhero,” He said, and Peter felt a lump form in his throat. 

“Wow,” Was all he could manage, and the kid waited patiently for Peter to compose himself. “Your favorite?” He nodded vigorously, beginning to smile. “Wow, it’s such an honor to meet you!” Peter couldn’t help but say, sitting back on his heels after a few seconds. 

“You’re so cool!” He gushed, and Peter felt his face flush underneath the mask. “Your suit is awesome, and you can do a flip!” Peter made a ‘stop it’ gesture with one hand, pressing his other hand to his cheek. “And you’re here!” The kid exclaimed, then quieted down. “You’re here at Pride,” 

“I am,” Peter affirmed, hesitating for a second before placing a hand on the kid’s shoulder. “Did you want to talk to me about anything in particular?” 

He hesitated for a second, then nodded. Peter waited quietly as the kid found his words. “My mom and dad...they don’t like me,” He said, at last, eyes downcast. “My friend’s mom is here with me today, she’s in the bathroom,” He pointed at the woman a few feet away, and Peter raised a hand in greeting to her. “I’m staying away from home for a little while...I’m a boy,” He said, confidently this time. “They don’t want me to be one, but I am!” He insisted, and Peter nodded along enthusiastically. 

“That sucks that they don’t accept you for who you are,” Peter said carefully, watching the kid’s reaction. “Some people have a lot of trouble wrapping their heads around things that are different, especially gender identity, and sexuality, and figuring it all out. But,”

He raised his head, looking into the lenses of Peter’s mask. “It gets better. You don’t have to listen to anybody but yourself when it comes to who you are. People will be mean, and they might not accept you, but there are also a lot of other people in the world. There will be ones who do accept you, ones who love you, ones who are your family. Your _actual_ family,”

He took a breath, watching the absolute awe in his expression. “Your parents might accept you, and they might not. Only time will tell. But that doesn’t mean you’re alone. Your friend! Your friend’s mom! They’re both here with you...and I think they care about you a lot,” He looked up at the woman again, who now had another child clinging to her leg, gaping at Peter.

“But hey,” He glanced at the kid again, smiling under the mask. “Take it from your friendly neighborhood Spidey...you’re pretty awesome too. And brave, and I’m here for you...whenever you see me on the street, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help. I care, too, and I love that you’re being who you are,” He took his final flower and held it out to the boy, watching as he took it with unsteady hands. 

“Really?” He said, his voice shaking. 

“Absolutely,” He assured, watching as the kid processed his words. It was all really cheesy, but he wasn’t lying. Peter _did_ care, and if he could help this kid out by just being there, he’d miss any test in the world. “Hey, what’s your name?” Peter asked, watching as the kid paused, pulling at his hoodie strings again. 

“It’s...Adam. My name is Adam,” Peter stood up, offering a hand for the kid to take, leaning down a little so they could walk side by side. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Adam,” He said as he walked him back to the woman, who was giving him a grateful grin. He kneeled down once again when they’d reached her, gesturing with a finger for him to come closer. 

“My names Peter,” He whispered to Adam, pressing a finger to his lips when he pulled away. Adam stared at him wide-eyed, then surged forward, hugging the surprised hero. Peter wasted no time in hugging him back, rubbing circles into his back. 

He eventually bid his farewells, reminding Adam that he was always there to help. As he swung away, landing on a rooftop not too far from the park, he ran into Daredevil. 

“That was very risky of you, just giving away your identity like that,” Peter rolled his eyes at the cold, wiggling his way under his arm, as they walked to the edge of the rooftop. 

“I think I can trust him,” Peter promised Matt, looking out over the parade. “I am his favorite superhero,”

“You’re a good kid,” Matt said instead of what he wanted to, knowing somewhere inside himself that Peter had complete confidence in his choice. 

“I know,” He elbowed Peter in the side, and he giggled, ducking out of his grasp and swinging away.

He had other things to do at Pride, and he intended to spend the next few hours enjoying himself. 

**Author's Note:**

> Team Red is the only team I unironically stan. I just love the dynamic of these bitches in Red, and although there are so many of these fic’s that already exist, I’m just making my sarcastic contribution. I also live for writing Peter Parker trash so yeah. Comment below and don’t be afraid to diss me or ask questions, I love being questioned. I also have a tumblr, so stalk me there if y’all’s wanna (@thatonedudeinthecorner). This fic will have a wack update schedule and I’m not sorry. Okay byyyyyeeee


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